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Autism through the mothers’ eyes




Ani Torosyan


1% of the world’s population has autism spectrum disorder. Throughout the whole journey of autism, parents are guiding them.  “Your child has autism...” Each parent reacts to this sentence differently:  shock, panic, stress, mixed feelings, depression. But the thing that unites them all is to do everything to make their lives easier and happier.

 

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Autism is...

Autism is a disease that first of all parents should overcome and then the child. Actually, a lot depends on parents, and it is very important for the parent to admit that his/ her child has autism spectrum disorder, instead of trying to hide that fact from society. Because in this case, the child will never be able to recover.  

As for me, I didn’t make dramas from the beginning. There was one thing I was thinking of; okay, there is a problem, so I have to find ways to solve it. And that is what I did basically.

First of all, I turned to specialists because I wanted to start the process of overcoming it correctly. And frankly speaking, I “took myself” to a psychologist, because there was a real need for that. Even if I didn’t panic, and approached the problem with a sober mind, however, the process of accepting the fact was a bit difficult and it took quite a lot of time. It is when you understand it, but you don’t want to accept it. In that sense, the phycologist was of great help to me. 

Once I was watching a show, and there was a quote that impressed me too much. It says “our child has the right to have autism, but we don’t have the right to make his/ her life uninteresting.” And back then I set a goal for myself: to do everything to make my child’s life better.  

 

34-year-old Karine, mother of a child with ASD

 

 

“Your child has autism.”

This is the sentence that changed my entire life. It is better not to say what I was feeling in the beginning, it just seemed to me at that moment that in the whole world there was only me and my child.  The thing is that I was just not ready to listen to that sentence. At school, they explained to us briefly, maybe in two or three sentences, and that is it.  And I couldn’t even imagine that there will come a time when I will be forced to live with that word every single day.

It has already been a few years since inclusive education existed in our society, and I think it is great. I would also like to study with children who have autism, as a result, I would be better prepared to be a mother of a child with autism.

My child was diagnosed with autism when he was 2.5-year-old. The most difficult thing here is that there is no cure for the disease, and no one knows what causes it as well. 

My child is very interesting and he is very smart. He hears everything, but he is out of the perception of this world, he has his own world, and does not want to go out.

Working with specialists helps a lot, my child had absolutely no words, but thanks to the specialists he was able to start saying words. I can say for sure that every word costs a life. 

Can you imagine what I was feeling when I heard him say “Mum” for the first time in his life at the age of 5? Can you imagine what it means at all?

 Anna, mother of a child with ASD

 

Parents should...

In this sphere, parents play a vital role. I know that being a parent of an autistic child is not that easy, but it is very necessary to be brave and start the therapy from the early stages. The sooner, the better. Because I can say for sure, that even those who are in a very bad condition, can make progress.

Daniel, who is attending our center, has a very unique case of autism, now he has made great progress, and it won’t be an exaggeration if I say that all this is because of his mother, Zara.

The first thing that parents can do is take their children to different kinds of therapies. But here, there is again a problem, either they attend too many therapies, or just one. There should be a balance. Too many therapies can be dangerous as well, and they can do more harm than good.  

The other thing that parents should do is not to isolate children from society, they should be part of it. Being in the surroundings of typically developing children helps them a lot, a child should realize that she/he is one of them. 

For the last two or three years, I have noticed that the cases are increasing. One of the problems that exist nowadays is that because of work, and because of being very busy, parents prefer their children to watch cartoons, just not to bother them. This happens usually when children are 3-5 years old, and this is the period when they need to develop their communication skills. Thus, as a result, autism spectrum disorder develops.

 The main work of a speech therapist should be to put the child in such situations that she/he can start talking, having a conversation. It is a time-consuming process, but the result that we are having, in the end, is worth it. 


Diana Davtyan, speech therapist, psychologist